Why people lie

We live in times where lying and deceit has become a habit because people assume that it is easy to get away with it. I’ve been thinking about why people lie, and while on the outside it may be due to various superficial reasons, at the very core of it, there’s only one reason and that is: our faith has become so weak that we don’t believe that God can take care of our affairs and so we take the matter in to our own hands and lie to (temporarily) get what we want.

Allaah says in the Qur’an, verse 70-71 in surah al-Ahzab:

“O you who have believed, fear Allaah and speak the truth (words of justice). He will [then] amend for you your deeds and forgive you your sins. And whoever obeys Allaah and His Messenger has certainly attained a great attainment.”

The word “يصلح” used in verse 71 comes from the root ص ل ح which means not only will He “amend” but set your affairs right. In other words, if you speak the truth, Allaah will take care of the rest. He will fix what’s broken. That’s a promise from a God who is al-‘Adl (the Most Just), al-Khabir (the All-Aware), al-Muhaymin (the Preserver of Safety), al-Fattah (the Reliever, One who will open closed doors for you), al-Razzaq (the Provider from unimaginable sources). He is Allaah, al-Wakil, the Universal Trustee, the only One you can rely on, no matter what it is that you’re going through, no matter what it is that you desire.

Instead of seeking a temporary means (lying, deceiving) to get what you want that you know will undoubtedly backfire soon enough, speak the truth and Allaah will surprise you with His Justice and reward.

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He’s got a plan for you.

Trust in God alone, and lean not on the needs of human help. Be not surprised when friends fail you; it is a failing world. Never reckon upon immutability in man: inconstancy you may reckon upon without fear of disappointment.

– Charles Spurgeon

 

Ever wondered how it feels to completely, utterly, carelessly, let go of yourself without a single worry about whether or not someone will have your back? I saw my friend’s son, barely 2 years old, do that. Yep. It was quite amazing! And I can promise most of you have already witnessed this.

 

He was playing around his mother and when he stood almost a foot away from her, he let himself fall back.. without blinking. As if he knew with unflinching certainty that his mother’s loving arms will be there to catch him. And there they were.. It made me realize how most of us as kids often did that with our parents, but now as grown ups we have completely forgotten or rather discarded that sense of true reliance. We have been told that Allaah’s Love for His creation is many times more than the love of a mother for her child. Yet, why do we so miserably fail to let ourselves go into His tender Love and care? If a mother and child can have that bond of totaly trust, then why can’t we have that with our Lord, our Creator, One who loves us more than anyone in this entire world, One who has control over every single atom that exists, One who Promises us goodness if we only have faith? Surely His Promises hold more value than those of the creation?

 

Alright, try this: Close your eyes (Ofcourse don’t close them yet, wait till ya read the end of this!). Picture yourself by the bank of a lake. All you can hear is the waves of water. All you can smell is the freshness of nature. Let go of every worry, forget every pain caused to you by others, forget that you’re in the middle of a divorce, or that you just had your heart broken by someone you gave your everything to, forget that you just lost your job, or that your doctor just told you you’re suffering cancer. Forget that you had a major fight with your bestfriend, or that your spouse spewed out the most awful words in a fit of anger. Let go.. Let go of everything and anything that attaches you to this world. Clear your mind. Now in the eye of your mind, let yourself fall back into Allaah’s Grace and Protection. This is where you will find safety. Allow that astounding sense of security and solace seep into your heart. This is your safe haven. Be like the 2 year old child.

 

Whenever you find your mind in the middle of a frenzy of thoughts, find a quiet space and repeat the above exercise. Believe me, there is nothing like the feeling of complete submission to Allaah and reliance on Him. You have it in your nature, its a part of you. You’ve just buried it deep inside as years passed you by.  

 

Allaah says in the Qur’aan:

 

“Say: Nothing will happen to us except what Allaah has decreed for us: He is our Protector: And on Allaah let the believers put their trust.” [at-Tawbah; 51]

 

He has been there for you all your life, watching you grow, providing for you.. sheltering you, loving you, protecting you, and above all, giving you the most simplest yet most precious blessing of being able to breathe every second. How can you then doubt that He won’t care for you for the rest of your life? Dig up that wonderful sense of trust and live it. Then only will you really and truly live your life.

A cage is a cage..

A cage no matter how appealing or luxurious, is a cage after all. And that’s what this world is like. We will only experience real freedom in Jannah.

Our Beloved, Our Prophet

Just reflecting on the life of our beloved Prophet sallallaahu `alayhi wasallam, and it pains the heart to think about the abuse and oppression he had to endure for the sake of this Ummah. How many times did the Quraysh throw filth and dirt on him? How many times was he slandered and rejected? And can we ever forget the incident of Ta’if where even his shoes were soaked in blood from the stones that were being throw at him? We can never be grateful enough for all his – sallallaahu `alayhi wasallam – sacrifices, but the least we can do is follow his footsteps and hold onto his sunnah with our dear lives. The recent film thats being spread around by some despicable people, by Allaah has no affect on him, and does not take away from his honor and his status with Allaah. But nonetheless, it hurts our hearts deeply and angers us beyond tolerance to see our beloved being attacked in such a wicked manner. Lets use that anger and that hurt to further his da`wah, to implement and spread his sunnah and let’s keep our tongues moist with sending salaam upon him.

Oh Allaah, make us his neighbors in Jannah!

My backyard.. My comfort zone.

Sitting in the backyard listening to the birds, watching the ants, feeling the cool breeze on my skin..and right now in this moment I feel peace. I’m content. And I’m filled with gratitude towards Allaah for every minute of my life; every second of sadness and every moment of joy because all of it combined has brought me to this place of calm and serenity from within. Altogether its made me, me.

Look around you. Theres so much to be thankful for. Step out of your little mental prison into the beauty Allaah has created for you. Those birds and ants and even the gorgeous roses may want nothing to do with us but Allaah placed them and everything else around us so that we can reflect upon them and so that when our world of self-imposed barriers gets too much to bear, we can escape into this  sanctuary to find some peace, freedom and comfort.

This too shall pass.

I haven’t been getting much sleep lately and by this morning I felt a massive headache kicking in, kinda like what people often describe as a hangover after getting drunk. For me, the hangover was from a piece of shattering news I received yesterday.

My heart felt constricted under the choking weight of grief like a lump in my throat. But as I finished praying fajr and raised my hands to make du`aa, a little voice inside me reminded me that this too shall pass.. I decided it was upto me: I could either wallow in misery or choose to be happy, do the best I can and continue living.

I chose happiness. For me, happiness = acceptance and being content in the present moment and to continue living with the mantra of never giving up. Its not easy to choose when you’re fighting off overwhelming emotional pain, but it most certainly is liberating.

Life as we know is all about making decisions and choices. For me, the most important daily decision to make is to start my day with renewed faith and making a conscious effort of choosing happiness regardless of my circumstances. And that results into a lighter, more content me.

Head over heels again?

As I was talking to a dear friend about love and falling for people, I was hit by an epiphany: You don’t have to fall in love with every sweet, someone-that-makes-you-all-ditsy, beautiful person out there.  Its like shopping for flowers or stationary for me. I have this thing.. whenever I visit my local Staples, I find it excruciatingly difficult to hold my self back from buying a basket full of funky pens, colored envelopes, writing pads of all sorts, etc.  Or when buying flowers, I tend to lose myself in all of the lovely colors of roses. In the end, I don’t walk out of the store with the entire stationary or flower aisle. I buy what suits my needs and what I like the most.

You don’t have to fall head over heels to pick something up. You can just pick it up and admire it. Just like we don’t buy every diamond that appeals to us, similarly as you grow you will meet people that you’re attracted to be it cause of their personality, the work they do, or their looks – but that does not mean you have to fall in love and/or marry them.

It is equally important to give yourself time to heal, especially if you have just come out of a broken relationship. No one’s going to stop you from looking around but just make sure you don’t fall head over heels for the next person that charms you. Give it and yourself time. In doing that, you’re honoring yourself and the one you admire.

Yours, with all your flaws

“We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.” – Sam Keen

I read this quote a while back and was just thinking about it today. I think that right there is one of the basic lessons that life teaches us about relationships. How often has the misconception of a perfect relationship pushed us to break apart ones that we have?

It all goes back to the idea of perfection and if such a thing really even exists. I believe it does. I believe perfection is in the acceptance of the imperfections of others. And that is the epitome of love. We are not angels, we are not expected to be flawless. But when you become more forgiving, you begin to see the world through a whole different lens — one that expands your horizons, that does not limit you or constrict you to the shallowness of this world but rather helps you see past the thorns in a bush of beautiful roses. It helps you accept the rose with its thorns, just as humans cannot be human without their flaws.

Let Him take care of you

The Prophet sallallaahu `alayhi wasallam said: “There is at night an hour, no Muslim happens to be asking Allaah any matter of this world or the Hereafter, except that he will be given it, and this (occurs) every night.”

If you’re feeling helpless, like no one cares; you look around and you see nothing but preying eyes..

You stand up after falling for the umpteenth time and you find yourself stumbling yet again; you struggle to carry your own weight but your knees can’t seem to take on anymore..

You’re worn out, tired. You feel nothing but sorrow and desperation..

Nothing makes sense, no choice you make seems to be the right one.

Deep inside you, something calls out of despair and frustration, begging to be saved..

And when all of this pushes you to the edge, let go. Let go and let Allaah take care of your heart. All you gotta do is wake up in the middle of the night when everyone else is in deep slumber, and just ask Him.

What do you see?

Henry David Thoreau once said: “Its not what you look at that matters, its what you see.”

A trend that most of us fall victim to is that we interpret our surroundings based on our moods. So if we’re angry, we find people annoying. If we’re hurt,  the world seems to be a mean place. But how about making a conscious effort to see the good in everything? Surely then, the world would seem less mean and a happier place?